Taking Procrastination to New Heights

So midway though writing my essay, I took a sip of my Mountain Dew and though, "Damn, this is some good stuff." And I wrote:

My Mountain Dew is cool and sweet
Every sip is like nirvana
I should be working on my paper
But I really do not wanna

This made me giggle. So I continued.

Schoolwork is so hard and dull
Rewards are few, and pleasures rare
But note the greatness of my beverage
Fizzy green beyond compare
Another sip, and oh! what bliss
Can be contained in Styrofoam
Oh! glorious nectar from Olympus
Transport me to your lofty home!

At this point, I figure I will continue to sound progressively more and more like Alexander Pope until either the poem ends, or I spontaneously transform into a 4'6" misanthropic Englishman. So I continue.

BUT: in all your hastiness
To drink the potion, do beware
Of quaffing quickly, sending it
Into the passage meant for air
If this mistake be made, such coughing
Will befall your trembling frame
That you shall loathe the green betrayer
And heap curses on its name

This is where I have stopped for now. I think Restoration through Romantics has had an influence on me that may be positive... or negative. Because I really shouldn't be writing poetry about my pop, but on the other hand... it's so much fun. And Mountain Dew deserves poetry. At least a little.